Water, water, everywhere . . .

Right now, in my refrigerator, there are several bottles of bottled water. And under a desk in my bedroom, there is an unopened case of the same bottled water. It is the last of three cases of water bought by my wife who drinks a lot of bottled water. When my wife and youngest daughter were lugging the stuff into the apartment, I raised my eyebrows in a questioning manner. “It was on sale!” was the chorus.

Also, in the kitchen of my apartment, there is a contraption called a “sink”. In the sink there are taps which you turn to make water run into the sink. The tap marked with a “C” gives you clear, cold; government tested water, certified fit for human consumption. And, it’s free.

Now, cold running water, delivered directly to your house or apartment, has been around for many years. Even back in the fifties, living on Bog Row down in Cape Breton, we had cold running water. Of course, if you ventured out into the countryside to visit Aunt Daisy, things got a little more complicated. There you had to prime the pump, and then pump the pump handle to get the water running before you could get a cool, refreshing drink . . . of free water.

Now, don’t anyone get the wrong impression here. I don’t begrudge a case or two of bottled water to anyone, especially my wife of nigh on to forty years. But . . .

Let’s look at some facts.

Nestlé Waters Canada has applied to extend its permit to pump 3.6 million litres of water a day in Aberfoyle and 1.1 million litres a day in Hillsburg for the next five years. That application drew about 6,000 letters of objection into the office of Ontario’s Ministry of the Environment.

According to Council of Canadians national chairperson Maude Barlow, “local residents need to be aware that a water crisis happening around the world can also happen in Guelph. Droughts are not just happening in Third World countries but in northern China, the Middle East, Australia and parts of the United States. It's a myth (in Canada) that we have so much water that we can afford to take it away, sell it and it'll never run out."

That, in and of itself, should be enough to make proponents of bottled water sit up and take notice. But, there’s another concern being overlooked by the environmentalists which is all too obvious to dumb old country boys like myself. If Nestle is drawing water from the same source as the local tap water, just why in hell are people paying for their stuff.

Now, consider this little news item from Reuters (South Africa). “Manufacturers of bottled water have hit back at accusations that they may be ripping-off consumers by selling tap water. Nestlé South Africa says its Pure Life product is obtained from an internationally approved source (unidentified) that is tested every six months. It has refuted allegations that Nestlé uses tap water and markets it as spring water.”

And, Coke has also worked to block public knowledge of its water source. Just a short time ago, Consumers International gave a Bad Product award to Dasani (water bottled by Coke), stating the honor was due to "pushing marketing into the realms of the ridiculous" by packaging water that came from the same source as tap water.

But, there are others guilty of “pushing marketing into the realms of the ridiculous”.

Claridges in London, one of the best known hotels in the world boasts three restaurants. It is now offering a "water menu" featuring more than 30 worldwide varieties of bottled water; iceberg water from Newfoundland, OGO water from the Netherlands which contains 35 times more oxygen than usual, water from New Zealand's finest volcanic springs, Tasmanian Rain, etc, etc. The cost? Anywhere from seven to thirty dollars a bottle.

And consider this item from Reuters (London), which claims, “Restaurants are pushing customers into buying expensive bottled water instead of offering them tap water for free, the government's consumer watchdog said on Friday. A five-star hotel in London charges 50 pounds (roughly 75 dollars) a litre and even chain restaurants charge 3.80 pounds (five dollars) for bottled mineral water.”

The article goes on to claim that a recent survey found that nine out of every 10 restaurants (in London) were pushing consumers to buy bottled water and failed to offer them free tap water.

Maker of horror films, David Cronenberg, once said, “The secret to a good horror film is to take ordinary events and extend them to their ultimate conclusion.” How about this for a possible horror scenario?

Coke and Pepsi buy the Great Lakes. Manufacturing concerns are forced to pay such high prices for their water that they move out of the country leaving millions unemployed. The public is forced to pay through the nose for Dasani and Aquafina. There is rioting in the streets of Toronto and hordes of thirsty, unemployed easterners are prepared to invade Alberta and BC to wrest control of their water supply.

Yeah, I know. It’ll never happen. By the time we get around to it, the Yanks will have already invaded Alberta and BC and there’ll be no water left.